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We love Jesus and believe in His goodness as reflected in His design for marriage. We also know that this world is hard, marriage can be hard, and let’s face it, each of us can be hard. Hopes for Marriage is committed to bringing free resources through weekly content to remind us of God’s truth, bring tools and ideas that will make a difference, and encouragement to stay the course. Oh, and also to have some (or a lot) of fun along the way! Why Hopes For Marriage: Because despite how it often feels, you are not alone - and we are not alone - in our desire to see God’s plan for marriage flourish. God called us into community for a purpose! Together we are far more resilient, able to withstand the storms of life, and far more effective in the call to reflect His love and grace to our spouse and one another. To stand together in all God has for us as husband and wife, that’s why there is always Hopes for Marriage!
Episodes
Monday Apr 10, 2023
Monday Apr 10, 2023
Our body tells a story, a more true story than even our words. In fact, if we hear words that are not aligned with what someone’s body is saying, we will always choose to believe the language of the body. Body language is at it’s root instinctual, automatic, and often subconscious, reflecting our most core emotions and thoughts - sometimes before those thoughts and feelings have even registered in the conscious mind. As you might imagine, the discrepancy between the language of words and body can be confusing at best, breaking down effective communication with our spouse, but can also be a powerful tool for growth and good.
Here’s some of what we talk about:
- How to be a detective and increase our self-awareness. We give a quick exercise to demonstrate the power of the internal experience and how that shows up in our body language.
- How to continue the work of being a detective with some NJN (Brian’s new acronym) for our spouse which will also provide space for growth and allow them to connect the dots between their internal and external world.
- How to respond when our body inevitably tells a story we didn’t intend, and how more importantly to be intentional in leveraging our body language for the good of our spouse.
Episode 18: Part of the Communication Stuff Series
Also check out "Level Up Your Listening" (Episode 15)
Watch the Videos & Subscribe on YouTube
Enjoy Truth Tuesdays & Fun Fridays @Hopes For Marriage on Instagram
Monday Apr 10, 2023
Monday Apr 10, 2023
Mind Reading, the super power we all think we have, but are so woefully under skilled in application. Remember the magic 8-ball we had as a kid - wishing we had the power to shake, read, and know exactly what was going to happen? (“Maybe this time the 8-ball will tell me if the cute boy/girl in class likes me!”) So silly, and yet we persist in trying to mind-read our spouse, assuming we know what they’re thinking, and then responding according to the one-sided narrative of our making.
Here’s some of what we talk about:
- 3 of the reasons we continue to wield our broken super power, even though we KNOW mind reading is not built on reality. (I’m SURE he is thinking the sofa on Etsy is the best use of our $, right?)
- 3 outcomes of spousal mind reading (teaser, none of the outcomes are awesome).
- The questions we need to ask ourselves to keep us grounded in reality, our mind open, and our spouse engaged.
Episode 19: Part of the Communication Stuff Series
Watch the Videos & Subscribe on YouTube
Enjoy Truth Tuesdays & Fun Fridays @Hopes For Marriage on Instagram
Monday Apr 10, 2023
Monday Apr 10, 2023
Have you been the victim of THE Silent Treatment? It’s the insidious withholding of communication - words, attention, affection, and connection - that communicates so much. It’s a response that is demeaning, degrading, mean, and wrong..and yet so common and frequently used. It’s time to unpack and address this nefarious tool of destruction.
In this episode here’s some of what we talk about:
- Why the silent treatment is so dang triggering.
- The goal of silent treatment, and why it sometimes makes you feel crazy.
- We clarify the the difference between SILENCE as a response vs. silent treatment.
- We give the 4 steps of how to respond if you are the victim of silent treatment to break the cycle.
If you are the one employing silent treatment we discuss the serious nature of this bludgeoning coping tool, with an encouragement and reminder of Good News that roots you in the truth to break the destructive cycle and enter a new era of open and gracious communication.
Episode 20: Part of the Communication Stuff Series
Watch the Videos & Subscribe on YouTube
Enjoy Truth Tuesdays & Fun Fridays @Hopes For Marriage on Instagram
Monday Apr 10, 2023
Monday Apr 10, 2023
Welcome to our first episode of Hopes For Marriage!
After a lot of years of being in pastoral Ministry for Brian. And a lot of years as a private practitioner as a mental health therapist Elisa. And even more years of being married we are excited to bring this channel to you with a lot of content to reinforce and encourage your marriage for what we believe God made super good and for your enjoyment and His glory so believe it or not we have a lot of thoughts ideas and hopefully hopes for what we want to bring for you to really be able to enjoy what God has given you and meant for good. So tune in. Find us on YouTube and Instagram @HopesForMarriage.
We can't wait to bring lots of encouraging, reinforcing, and helpful content to strengthen your marriage for the glory of God and your joy.
Watch the Videos & Subscribe on YouTube
Enjoy Truth Tuesdays & Fun Fridays @Hopes For Marriage on Instagram
Hopes For Marriage
HfM is committed to bringing free resources to remind us of God’s truth, to bring tools and ideas that will make a difference, and to encourage you to stay the course. Oh, and also to have some (or a lot) of fun along the way!
Why HfM?
Because despite how it often feels, you are not alone and we are not alone in our desire to see God’s plan for marriage flourish.
God called us into community for a purpose! Together we are far more resilient, able to withstand the storms of life, and far more effective in the call to reflect His love and grace to our spouse and one another. To stand together in all God has for us as husband and wife, that’s why there is always
Hopes for Marriage!
About us:
We care deeply and believe wholeheartedly in the covenant of marriage.
With over 30 years of marriage and 25+ years of Brian being a pastor and Elisa a mental health therapist, our experience personally and professionally has cultivated both a conviction of the goodness and the need for strengthening joy- and Jesus-filled marriages.
We are the reflection of Jesus and the case study of a gospel saturated marriage, NOT the goal or marriage to be venerated.
Beyond loving Jesus and each other, we also love good food, drink and music, hosting new and old friends, diy projects that are typically over our head, camping, hiking, and all manner of outdoor adventures. We love our town of Walla Walla, our local church body - Mission Church, and our awesome kids and granddaughter - who are some of the coolest people we know!
We are honored to be in this work of reclaiming marriage as an expression of God’s goodness and anticipate that with you we have really good things ahead!
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